Narcissus flower is poisonous. Narcissus poetic; bouquet narcissus; narcissus jonquil. What to do with his persecution and attempts to return

1. When do narcissists cut contact?
They don't interrupt him. Rather, they "play silent" or simply reject you.

When a narcissist begins to ignore you, block communication, and leave you for a couple of weeks "for a while", he does this in order to force you to accept his "conditions" and agree to his further abusive behavior.

For example, this usually happens when you pointed out his injustice, exposed a deceit, or expressed your displeasure with what he said or did. The "silent game" is direct manipulation that the narcissist uses while in an already developed relationship. As a rule, at this time he finds a new “nartsresource” on the side.

Finding a new supplier the right resource, they drop you, but more often than not, this is not the final ending. At this point, you may be notified that they have found someone else, or simply walk away in English, and start blocking any of your attempts to "get in touch with them." However, this will not mean a complete break in contact.

This is an act of rejection - they got bored with you and needed new stimulation, or they fell into a period of insignificance and need to put in order the chaos that they created around them.

Imagine that you, while walking in the park, stepped on a pile of dog droppings. You are disgusted, and all your thoughts now are only about how to cleanse yourself and get rid of bad smell. This is how a narcissist feels when they start ignoring you. He does not want to mess with your emotions, tears and demands for fidelity and a normal attitude towards you.

It is important to remember that you are just fine. The narcissist simply does what the "voice of the ego" in his head tells him to do. Think of them like serial killers. They really don't control themselves.

2) Can a narcissist "love again" their spouse or significant other?
The narcissist is not interested in learning anything, except to improve their ways of controlling and manipulating. Besides, how can they “redo” something that they have never done before?

With t.sp. narcissist, it should be about his comfort, convenience, about doing what he likes and having full freedom to hunt for a fresh resource. This explains why they almost always cheat on partners.

Even if you don't have evidence of their cheating, they still commit it because know that any relationship with them ends sooner or later, whether on their initiative or because the victim can no longer endure their bullying.

3) How does the narcissist feel during the disconnection on your part?

Panic and anger. If “something went wrong” and the narcissist did not have time to provide himself with a new resource at the time you decided to break up with him, he panics. “War is war, but you always want to eat” - the narcissist needs a source of resource to survive. That's why they will repeatedly try to win you back, and when they succeed, they will break up with you later, finding themselves a new resource provider that is suitable in every sense.

In addition, the narcissist is infuriated that you have appropriated his perverted power. How dare you? After all, he is the one who rules the show here, and you should know where your place is ... that's why he first "pings", returning you, and then suddenly leaves you again.

By accepting a narcissist back after a boycott, you are setting yourself up for even more suffering and unhappiness. There is simply no other way.

4) Can I get to the bottom of his true self?
The narcissist has no real personality of his own. He has only a false ego. Therefore, whatever you say or do will not change his point of view; they are unable to see anything but their ego. And they will do and say whatever is necessary to preserve it.

Narcissists have a bit of a reptilian mind and have a ton of different adaptations that allow them to live in society. Just like some species of lizards, which can, for example, nod their heads, expressing various emotions. Their primary drive is to establish and defend a territory (ego). They are tyrannical to the extreme, although they mask it when interacting with society and romantic partners.

(Experiment: Visit the local pet store. Find some bastard there. Try to understand its true nature. The desired result will be similar to trying to understand the "true nature" of a narcissist).

5. What can I do to get the narcissist to forgive me?

Sorry for what? For trying to set healthy boundaries? Need respect? Or rebelled against his abusive treatment? Narcissists are incapable of "forgiveness". Each interaction for them is a battle of two wills. Even if they pretend to "forgive" you, you can bet they're plotting revenge behind the scenes. Even if they don't "forgive" you, they will still dream of revenge and it will be disgusting.
Remember how you ate the last crab seven years ago, on one of your first dates? I'm sure not. And they remember. And find ways to make you pay still.

My goal is to inform you as fully as possible about narcissistic habits so that you figure them out “from three notes”, before you have had time to get close and attached. Ideally: distancing yourself from the suspicious subject at the stage when he is not interested in you. Based on observations of his attitude towards other people and on the information received about him.

And it seems to me that in the matter of recognizing "alien" extremely importance has the ability not only to listen, but also to hear. Hear exactly what you were told without translating into "human" language. The narcissist's speech is specific, and normal person on an intuitive level, he recognizes it as alien, vaguely surprised by it, but at the same time fascinated by its “mysteriousness”, otherness.

So let's take a look at what the narcissist says and what we hear.

In the book, I list the features of the narcissist's speech. So, he actively uses predatory, “vampire” (drug addict, alcohol), “cannibal”, “hunting”, cheating-gambling vocabulary.

- "I want to be powered by your battery”, “You sucked all the blood out of me”, “Run away from me, I'm a werewolf”

-​ “You are my prisoner” (jokes can also spin in the same plane: “I will put you in my underground, and you will be my sex slave”, “Are you not afraid to walk with me through the forest? What if I rape you and kill you? "")

- ​ "Man is the hunter, woman is the prey"

-​ “I’ll turn you inside out”, “I guarantee you: a smile will never appear on your face again”, “I’ll cut out this goat’s liver, eat the brain”, “It’s great to feel that in the coming years you ruined her life” .(even if a person does not say such phrases to you, but refers to someone else, this is a very bad sign)

- "When we met, you got three aces"(further on, the person described his relationship with the reader as a party in a “swarm”).

The narcissist vaguely or distinctly feels his badness and hypocrisy, and sometimes blurts out, as if in a fit of frankness:

- "I'm ugly, I composted his brains and I'll be with you"

- "I'm angry, I'm very angry"

-​ "Do I really look like a ruthless spider?"

-​ "Communication with me is deadly."

-​ "I love it when women cry because of me."

-​ "I would be a brilliant actor"

-​ “leave me, I’m an asshole, find yourself a normal man” (As the song says: “don’t love me like that, don’t wait all night for me to be bad, give your heart to another, because I’m just a scoundrel”)

-​ "You were doomed from the first day we met."

It is noteworthy that the narcissist often speaks of himself as a "type", "shell", "wrapper". Tell me, would it occur to you to call yourself a shell? To say about someone's sympathy: "He rushes from my shell"? Personally, I would say this: "I like him externally."

The seemingly insignificant narcissist in the phase of Seduction pours out the words “I admire”, “I bow”, “I adore”, “I envy white envy”. Hearing this, I recommend to strain hard. This is how narcissistic idealization is expressed, which is based, as one of the researchers read, “envious furore”. For what follows idealization, see How the Narcissist Devalues.

According to Sam Vaknin, the daffodil likes to use superlatives ("absolutely", "perfectly", "wonderful"). Personally, I didn’t catch familiar narcissists on this, however, replaying, “disproportionate affect” - that is, an expression of feelings that is not adequate to the event - is palpable in their speech.

Therefore, be critical of the lofty admiration for your qualities. A normal man does not call a woman a “muse”, “goddess”, “ideal”, “unearthly”, “star of captivating happiness”, “a cocktail of mega-femininity, delicacy and intelligence”, etc. And if he does, it is half-jokingly and occasionally.

But I confirm the following observation of Vaknin completely and completely:

"The narcissist likes to talk about himself in mechanical terms - "machine", "efficient", "punctual", "result", "computer", "optimal" .

I will add - not only about myself, but also about others. A reader says:

“Once I asked him: if Sveta (parallel victim) is so bad, then why don’t you leave her? And he answered:
- She has good performance characteristics.

Here I am stupid! He spoke frankly about a person as a thing. How about a car. She drives fast. She has good aerodynamics and an engine of 300 horses. Excellent performance characteristics. "

Another reader says:

“When the narcissist didn’t give any reaction to my sexual actions that I could understand, I asked him if I was doing everything right. To which I heard: “Optimal!”

By the way, it is people of this personality type who have lists of requirements for an “ideal partner”. And this also manifests the desire to choose a partner-function, a partner-thing with optimal performance characteristics.

“They willingly list the characteristics they are looking for in a partner, and quickly lose interest in someone who does not have all the necessary external, personal and social qualities,- American psychoanalysts Beck and Freeman confirm.

By the way, the speech of Sam Vaknin himself is very indicative. Read. His style evokes conflicting feelings in me: magical charm and at the same time rejection, in places - disgust. Here is an excerpt:

"Many narcissists have 'emotional resonance tables'. They use words like others use algebraic signs: with scrupulousness, caution, craftsmanship. They sculpt finely tuned reverberations of pain, love, and fear from words."

The speech of another narcissist may seem artificial, ornate, overly literary to you.. A normal man is unlikely to describe his interest in you in such terms:

- "Gas has already been supplied, and the light is on"

- "The cocktail of your unique options is not to be missed"(again - options! Again - a cocktail!).

And dissatisfaction with you is unlikely to be described as follows:

- "You're a Nobel laureate for sucking blood out of me."

The narcissist's speech is often illogical and is a set of mutually exclusive statements.. Take a look at How a Narcissist Devalues ​​and reread the letters in it. A man manages to tell a woman in one paragraph that outwardly she is not ale, and right there - that she is ... Sophia Loren. I’m already silent that, pouring shit on her, he through the word assures her of friendship, devotion, and so on. The logic of the narcissist is inscrutable...

One of the main speech chips of a narcissist is understatement and messages that can be interpreted this way, that way, and five more manners. Let's listen to the reader:

“At the beginning of our relationship, I told him that I only accept mutual feelings, to which I received the answer: “Trust me, reciprocity is not something you should worry about.” I understood this ornate answer as follows: “do not worry, everything is mutual with us.”

The true meaning of these words was revealed to me very soon, when, in a fit of narcissistic anger, a man told me that he had no idea what love was at all and that he could feel something distant only after several years of communication with a woman. Of course, with the "ideal" woman.

Thus, the phrase should have been translated as follows: “There can be no talk of any reciprocity, by definition, because I am incapable of love. Therefore, you should not worry. What is the point of worrying about what is not, was not and will not be?

The same technique - messages that can be read this way and that - was used in his fiery speech to Sushkova and Lermontov:

“Tell me, if two young people loved you at the same time, one - let him be L<опу>hin, he is rich, happy, everyone smiles at him, everyone bows before him, everything is available to him, solely because he is rich!

The other young man is far from rich, not noble, not good-looking, but smart, but ardent, receptive and deeply unhappy; he stands on the edge of the abyss, because he doesn’t believe in anyone and in anything, he doesn’t know what reciprocity is, what mother’s affection is, sister’s friendship, and if this poor man dared to turn to you and say to you: save me, I adore you , you will make a great man out of me, love me, and I will believe in God, you alone can save my soul. Tell me what would you do?"

Of course, a normal person, which was Sushkova, understands the meaning of this phrase as if Lermontov is “another young man”. And this is not a desire to pass off wishful thinking, not a girl's fantasy, but a consequence of a malicious play on words.

Evaluate Lermontov's speech from the point of view of the laws of logic. Firstly, an unambiguous parallel is drawn between the first and second person, that is, it is indicated that they are rivals, and in this situation it is obvious to Sushkova that Lermontov competes with Lopukhin for her love.

Secondly, the second young man is endowed with all the features of Lermontov (except for the sister who came from somewhere) - nevertheless, he was not named. In order for the meaning of words to become unambiguous, only one puzzle is missing - the name of the second young man. It is logical that, swirled by Lermontov's courtship and at the moment listening to his passionate speech, supported by non-verbal signs, Sushkova intuitively completes the picture: this second “nameless” person is Lermontov.

However, the cunning man deliberately constructed the phrase in such a way that Lopukhin's name is mentioned, but the name of the "rival" is not. Very prudent and very convenient to say at the right moment: “Me? To you? Confessed in love? God bless you, deushka. You are not my type at all. I just simulated the situation and asked for your opinion, which of the two would you prefer. Approximately this is what Lermontov did in the future.

In the subject, I recalled the grotesque disclosure of the theme of "translation difficulties" in Mayakovsky's The Young Lady and Vulvoort. :

"... I'm coming

and move my lips

as if

through glass

I speak English.

"You sit

slammed with the eyes of the bourgeoisie.

What is hopeful?

Fool of fools."

And the girl hears:

"Open,

open di dor".

"What do you care

about someone else's mustache?

Here...

planted...

like a fool spruce."

And the girl

fantasy inflates the sails,

and the girl hears:

"I love you".

I'm angry:

"Get out,

break the window,

and hand out razors

for fat throats.

The girl thinks:

"May,

my girl".

In the article "Romantics ... from the big road" I noted interesting feature: narcissists rarely use the word "love", "love". At least those that I saw myself and that readers told me about. Nevertheless, at first we perceive the narcissistic attitude towards ourselves as love. Why? Because the narcissist says a lot of other things, like outpourings of love. Plus, his constant presence in our lives is interpreted by us as a great need for us.

I ask many people: did they tell you in plain text that they love you? So, in the vast majority of cases, it turns out that it is not. One narcissist mumbled a “yes” in response to her leading question. He bombarded another with phrases in his repertoire:

- "You are my drug",

- "I'll be with you to the grave"

-​ "We're the same blood"

- "We found each other", etc.

The third one furnished his interest with synonyms:

- "I love you"

-​ "You and I are in love with each other"

-​ "I can't get this love out of me."

The fourth avoided any conversation on this subject at all, but during the Seduction phase he wore flowers, coffee and chocolates, which was regarded as a wordless confession. Like, "love is not spoken about in words."

However, this feature can only be called additional. A shameless and irresponsible narcissist does not have to repeat “I love you” even a hundred times a day. And then declare that it was yesterday, but now everything has changed, because you deceived his expectations, fall short of his bar, not his type, not his taste, etc.

Many are caught on this hook. In an effort to return love, they begin to dance to the tune of a narcissist and soon they start making very virtuoso steps, but they still don’t hear words about love. Now the narcissist uses them for only one use: as a killer ingredient in a sugar show.

Fortunately for us who are willing and able to hear, the eternal sham and werewolf narcissist often let it slip. Pierced precisely on the choice of words. Is it because he doesn't have the intelligence to disguise his speech as "normal"? Of course not. The reason was very aptly formulated by a reader:

“Yes, they are lying. But their lie is in other things. Type of change and so on. It is possible to catch them by the ass, that is, to recognize them, precisely by personal statements regarding others. Because they don't filter them. They are Martians, they do not know that people perceive and choose each other differently, and are friends with each other for other motives. That is why they do not hide, and do not hide. Because they think that everything is the same with each other, like objects. Not knowing that it is a deformity, they make no attempt to hide it. And they say how they think, how they feel.

Until I stop. But I think I'll come back to this topic. Write about your observations. Let's analyze together. And over time, we will write the Narcissus Dictionary. :) Because their phrases are very similar...

Plants are not only an ornament of our life and a source of nutrients. There are also dangerous plants that can harm humans. There is even a map of the poisonous plants of the world, one contact with which can be fatal - not only for an animal, but also for a person. You will find out which plants are dangerous to health and which predator plants prey on insects on this page.

There are more than 10,000 species of poisonous plants on Earth. Most of them grow in hot countries, but they are also found in the temperate zone. Speaking about which plants are life-threatening, mushrooms, ferns, and flowering plants are also mentioned. However, often only one part of them is poisonous, such as bitter almond seeds or potato berries, while other parts of the plant are edible. There are also such poisonous and dangerous plants that you can not even touch with your hands. We should not forget that many plant poisons in small doses are medicine.

Which plant is life-threatening: manchineel

Mancinella notorious for its poisonous milky sap. It is found in all its parts - in stems, and in roots, and in leaves, and in fruits. The manchineel tree is considered one of the most poisonous on Earth.

Poisonous manchineella from the Euphorbiaceae family grows in the northern part of South America, in Central America and the islands of the Caribbean.

Dangerous plants for humans: wrestler and hemlock

Fighter, or aconite, from the buttercup family is a perennial poisonous plant.

It has been known for a very long time. According to ancient Greek myth, these flowers first grew where the poisonous saliva of the dog Cerberus, the guardian of the underworld, who was captured by Hercules, had flowed to the ground, having completed his twelfth feat. All parts of aconite contain poison, mainly alkaloid aconitine. The ancient Gauls and Germans rubbed arrowheads and spears with the extract of this plant. And today, many types of aconite are used to produce medicines. The wrestler (aconite) is also bred for the sake of beautiful flowers.

hemlock contains the poison koniin, leading to suffocation. All parts of the plant are poisonous, and even simple contact with the skin causes irritation. Therefore, when harvesting this plant, you must be careful. And they collect hemlock in order to make medicines from it - anti-inflammatory, painkillers, sedatives.

Which plants are dangerous to health: henbane and belladonna

At the henbane- plants from the nightshade family - seeds are especially poisonous. This dangerous plant for humans causes confusion, fever, blurred vision and hallucinations. This is where the expression came from: “Are you overeating henbane?”

belladonna(translated from Italian - "beautiful lady"), or belladonna, contains atropine, which dilates the pupils and makes the eyes shine. In the old days, many women specially instilled belladonna juice into their eyes. However, atropine can cause strong excitement, even rabies, which is why the plant is also called "rabies". But for rodents and birds it is harmless.

poisonous daffodils

Daffodils are poisonous, their leaves contain the alkaloid lycarin, and the bulbs contain narcissin, which is dangerous to humans and animals. Therefore, daffodil bulbs, unlike tulips, do not attract rodents.

Look at the photo of this dangerous plant- daffodils are very beautiful, they are grown for beauty, but their bulbs are not only inedible, but also poisonous.

poisonous anchar tree

Anchar, growing on the islands of Indonesia, for a long time in Europe was considered the "tree of death", on the branches of which even birds do not sit down.

Such information was brought from his travels by the Dutch botanist Rumpf. Pushkin dedicated a poem to the Anchar, where a slave obtained branches and tree resin for his master, but died from poison. Now it is already known that only milky juice is poisonous in anchar, but it can only cause boils on the skin.

The poison becomes life-threatening only after distillation, in concentrated form. The locals lubricated arrowheads with them.

Herbivorous carnivorous plants

Most plants have enough carbon, water and minerals for life. However, among them there are real predatory plants that, with the help of trapping leaves, hunt other plants, animals, most often insects. Insects take the trapping leaf for a flower, sit on it and fall into a trap.

And the traps of insectivorous and herbivorous predator plants are different - these are jugs with lids or villi, and leaves that close over prey like jaws, and sticky leaves, and bubbles that suck prey like a vacuum cleaner. And some plants do not wait until prey is caught, but catch it themselves if it inadvertently approaches.

Which plants are predators: pemphigus and nepenthes

Speaking about which plants are predators, one of the first to remember is pemphigus. It is considered the fastest predatory plant, and maybe the fastest predator in the world. She pumps water out of a trapping vial, which she closes with a valve. When prey, a small aquatic animal, approaches the bubble, the valve opens and the pressure difference draws the prey inside along with the flow of water in less than a thousandth of a second.

The tropical insectivorous plant Nepenthes is a liana reaching a length of about 10-15 m. Some leaves of Nepenthes are trapping.

Look at the photo of this predator plant: a tendril protrudes from the tip of the leaf, which then expands and forms a jug or bowl.

The average size of such a trap is about 25 cm long and 12 cm wide. The largest jug in this species has a volume of 1.5 liters. Monkeys like to drink from it, and therefore the plant was nicknamed "monkey cup".

In addition to rainwater, it also has its own liquid. Not only insects, but even rats drown in this jug. They can't get out because the trap closes quickly. Nepenthes are widely grown as ornamental plants.

Predatory plants flycatcher and sundew

Venus flytrap It feeds on spiders, slugs, but its main food is flies. The plant attracts insects with its nectar-like scent.

When the fly sits on the edge of the leaf, it touches the sensitive hairs on its surface. And the plant immediately reacts: the jagged edges of the green walls of the trap close around the fly. Immediately, the digestive juice begins to stand out, and there is no way out for the fly - it is eaten by the plant.

Sundew leaves are covered with reddish glandular hairs, 4-5 mm in size, with round heads at the ends. These hairs are sensitive to irritation, and when the insect hits the leaf, it bends and captures the prey.

An insect cannot get out of such a trap: the hairs secrete a sticky liquid that paralyzes it and begins to digest it. A mosquito, a fly, and a large dragonfly can become a victim of sundew.

" comes from the Greek "narcao" - to intoxicate, stun. Indeed, this flower is charming. No wonder daffodils for the first time in the history of mankind began to plant flower beds. Delicate petals, folded like a crown, attract the eye, and the delicate aroma evokes the sweetest dreams in the soul.

The beauty of the narcissus was sung by poets and artists. Remaining nameless, the artist who painted the ancient walls of Pompeii wove the image of a daffodil into the overall design. And at the end of the nineteenth century, daffodils became the subject of one of the paintings of Vincent van Gogh.

Muslims today revere narcissus as one of the flowers especially noted by the prophet Muhammad. His words about the narcissus even became a proverb: “Having two loaves, sell one and buy a narcissus flower. After all, if bread nourishes the body, then the daffodil nourishes the soul. But if in the East daffodils were valued as the greatest God's gift, introducing a person to the world of beauty, then in Ancient Rome they symbolized triumph - these flowers decorated the soldiers who returned victorious from the military field.

The Hellenes composed one of the most beautiful and sad legends about him.

Aphrodite, goddess of love, punished Narcissus... with love for himself! The young man leaned down to the surface of the water to drink, and froze, amazed at his beauty. So he could not take his eyes off his reflection - he forgot about everything in the world, stopped eating and drinking - he just looked and looked at the wondrous face in the mirror of the waters. And his unrequited feeling was so strong that the beautiful young man withered away. But the gods could not allow such beauty to disappear from the face of the earth and turned the unfortunate man into a marvelous flower, a narcissus.

At the end of the 20th century, about a thousand specialists around the world were already engaged in the selection of daffodils. Now more than 30 thousand varieties of narcissus have been bred and 200-300 new ones appear annually.

Besides that narcissus beautiful and has a marvelous aroma, it is also healing. IN medicinal purposes plant bulbs are used. Narcissus preparations have antimicrobial, anti-inflammatory, wound-healing effects.

Mastitis (inflammation of the mammary gland), suppuration (including boils)

Mix thick rice porridge with fresh narcissus bulb grated on a fine grater (in a ratio of 1: 1), apply on a sore chest or affected areas of the skin, cover with cellophane on top, fix with a band-aid. Change the compress daily, until healing.

Hemorrhoids, articular rheumatism, sciatica

Mix the finely grated narcissus bulb with vegetable oil(Infuse in the ratio for 4-5 days, strain. Store the infusion in the refrigerator. Rub it on sore joints at night. For hemorrhoids, apply gauze swabs soaked in this infusion to the inflamed veins for 2-3 hours daily.

Non-healing ulcers, purulent wounds

Mix the onion grated on a fine grater with honey in a ratio of 1: 3, spread the mixture on a dense cloth and apply to the affected area of ​​the skin, fix with a bandage. Change the bandage 1-2 times a day.

All parts of the daffodil are relatively poisonous, so it is only used externally. Ready-made preparations must be stored out of the reach of children.